2013-07-18 17:06:01 UTC
hourly. A level 3
alert has been issued and I would implore you all not to go out
unless it's really essential like a visit to the off licence.
The numbers of dead are forecast to double over
the next week and ice cream is expected to run out over much of
Water may run out in parts of London as result of people
foolishly drinking more of it. Detailed warnings are here -
It's expected that a level 345 warning
may have to be issued if the temperature continue to rise and in
which case all life on earth will be extinguished unless you all put
giant windmills on your roofs and pay 110 percent your wages in taxes.
I know I can count on your co-operation.